Archive for the ‘Humor’ Category

…while your spouse/partner is taking their sweet time:

– Set all the alarm clocks in House wares to go off at 5-minute intervals.

– Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone,’Code 3′ in house wares ….. and see what happens.

– Go the Service Desk and ask to put a bag of M and M’s on layaway.

– Set up a tent in the camping department and tell other shoppers you’ll invite them in if they’ll bring pillows from the bedding department.

– When a clerk asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask ‘Why can’t you people just leave me alone?’

– While handling guns in the hunting department, ask the clerk if he knows where the anti-depressants are.

– Dart around the store suspiciously loudly humming the “Mission Impossible” theme.

– In the auto department, practice your “Madonna look” using different size funnels.

– Hide in a clothing rack and when people browse through, say “PICK ME!”

– When an announcement comes over the loud speaker, assume the fetal position and scream “NO! NO! It’s those voices again!!!!”

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